Author Archives: admin

Women’s sexual dysfunction

Although many sources refer to women’s ‘sexual dysfunc­tion’, it is rare to find a defin­i­tion of what is supposed to be sexu­ally ‘normal’ for women in the first place.

Sex involves both repro­duc­tion and sexual pleasure. So in repro­ductive terms, a man could be described as sexu­ally dysfunc­tional if he cannot impreg­nate a female (male orgasm required) and a woman if she cannot conceive (female orgasm not required) Continue reading

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Male nudity does not cause female sexual arousal

The naked male body can be a beau­tiful sight and yet our hetero­sexual society is domin­ated by images of women’s bodies. The ancient Greeks were more relaxed about homo­sexu­ality and statues indicate their appre­ci­ation of the sensual male nude.

Gay men certainly appre­ciate the naked male, including male genitals but women are often offended by nudity, espe­cially genitals, and so nudity is censored in our society.

Andrew Continue reading

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How to use a vibrator to discover orgasm

Laura was educated and cultured but she also had a world­li­ness and the classy sex appeal that attracts the most ambi­tious men. In her early thirties, Laura told me that she had always been confident that she had orgasms during sex.

…in regard to sexual respons­ive­ness the female matures much later than the male.” (p126 Sexual beha­vior in the human female 1953)

When she was twenty-eight, a Continue reading

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Women’s sexual desire

Women who live alone or do not have an active sex life with their partner some­times perceive them­selves to be sexu­ally needy because they start to doubt their ability to attract men.

Margaret (early fifties, chil­dren, rela­tion­ship 30 years) was confident that she was highly sexual and inter­ested in sex. However, her sexual rela­tion­ship with her partner had broken down and she admitted that she did not consider Continue reading

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Advice on female orgasm

Given the prac­tical nature of sex (book-learning only gets you so far!) we tend to assume that sex experts have personal exper­i­ence to support their ‘expertise’.

Such is our embar­rass­ment over sex that even when a person is advising others about sex we think it improper to ask them to account for their sexual exper­i­ences. Yet these exper­i­ences contribute towards their authority and support their qualifications.

Most Continue reading

Posted in Sex advice today | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments

Men hope a lover will enhance their sexual arousal

The sex industry (pros­ti­tu­tion and porno­graphy) is a clear indic­a­tion that men’s desire to enjoy their own sexual arousal and orgasm cannot be satis­fied through their rela­tion­ships with women alone.

It’s easy for a woman to figure out that men want sex… but they also want to be loved and appre­ci­ated through their sexual relationship.

  • Men’s sexual arousal is usually easy and imme­diate. Despite the evidence

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Posted in Understanding men | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Taking the ego out of sex advice

Why do adults so often assume that they know everything about sex when most people have never even read a sex manual?

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but why do they have to flaunt their own sexual ego? Whatever our own personal views there is abso­lutely no need to express them in a way that belittles other people.

Despite their inex­per­i­ence, women can be supremely Continue reading

Posted in Misconceptions | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

How to pleasure a man

Tracy Cox (author of ‘Hot Sex’ 1998) tells the story of a woman who welcomes her partner home wearing a sexy night­dress, with cham­pagne by the bed and a porno­graphic movie ready to play. If she does this regu­larly over the longer term then I take my hat off to her!

Her partner is a very lucky man. More real­ist­ic­ally such pampering to a man’s sexual fantasies is Continue reading

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Intercourse does not facilitate female orgasm

Men’s sexual arousal is usually easy, which gives them a natural advantage. As a consequence, while men can usually hope for orgasm from their sexual encoun­ters, most women have to settle for the more diffused sensa­tions of sexual arousal.

“Sex is a very different exper­i­ence for women and men. A man exper­i­ences pleasure primarily as a release of sexual tension. A woman exper­i­ences sex in an opposite way Continue reading

Posted in Emotional intimacy | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Pleasuring a woman

An erec­tion might feel good but it is likely to be a disad­vantage if a man wants to devote time to pleas­uring a woman. After all, two minutes is a typical time given for a man to reach orgasm!

A man can learn tech­niques for slowing his arousal and increasing the time he takes to orgasm by investing private time during masturbation.

Basic­ally, a man needs Continue reading

Posted in Enjoying sex play | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments