Category Archives: Female masturbation
Laura was educated and cultured but she also had a worldliness and the classy sex appeal that attracts the most ambitious men. In her early thirties, Laura told me that she had always been confident that she had orgasms during sex.
“…in regard to sexual responsiveness the female matures much later than the male.” (p126 Sexual behavior in the human female 1953)
When she was twenty-eight, a Continue reading
Graphs are not very exciting concepts but nevertheless they can be useful. Imagine the male orgasm graph which looks a little like a vertical phallic symbol. Then imagine the female orgasm graph which looks like the outline of a woman’s vulva.
Shere Hite identified two main approaches that women used to increase clitoral stimulation and their chances of orgasm during intercourse. They either maximised DIRECT clitoral stimulation by using masturbation during sex or they used positions and techniques for sexual intercourse that maximised INDIRECT clitoral stimulation caused by the penis thrusting into the vagina.
“… orgasm is most likely to come when the woman takes over responsibility for Continue reading
Carolyn, a relationship counsellor in her fifties, told me she thought it unwise to positively encourage female masturbation. She did not give her reasons.
“Many women think of masturbation as unnatural and disgusting and a complete waste of time, and don’t understand why anybody does it and are unsympathetic to the view that people might continue to do it even though they have sexual partners. The majority Continue reading
Becky explained via e-mail: “I had my first orgasm at 26 during masturbation — pretty late I know & since then no stopping me with the sex toys : ) . Plenty of my girlfriends have not though — and like you say, don’t seem too bothered about it which I can’t understand.”
Despite this evidence Becky was convinced that every woman must be interested in orgasm. Many Continue reading
Almost complete mystery surrounds women’s sexual arousal. Women’s PHYSICAL arousal is rarely acknowledged and our understanding of women’s PSYCHOLOGICAL arousal is very vague. No wonder many of us gain the impression that female orgasms simply mushroom up out of nowhere.
Some women appear to be so sheltered from the world of adult eroticism that one wonders if they have ever experienced sexual urges of any kind.
Nancy, a recently widowed woman Continue reading
In the film ‘Shirley Valentine’ (1989), Pauline Collins plays Shirley, a middle-aged housewife. Shirley comments: “I’m not particularly fond of it – sex.
I think sex is like supermarkets, you know, overrated. Just a lot of pushing and shoving and you still come out with very little in the end.” (Note: this film was set in the days before supermarkets sold everything from clothes to microwaves!)
Shirley Continue reading
I’m sure that men will understand the point. We express our sexuality through two basic phenomena:
- Firstly, enjoying our own PSYCHOLOGICAL arousal by appreciating eroticism; and
- Secondly, bringing our sexual arousal to orgasm by PHYSICAL stimulation of the genitals.
Yet many women are shocked by eroticism (whether visual or verbal pornography, erotica or the concept of sexual fantasy) and equally shocked by the Continue reading