Category Archives: Understanding men

Long-term sexual relationships

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Why in our liber­ated times do women still accept ‘putting up with sex’ just to avoid being single? I am not judging anyone else’s exper­i­ences. If other women are content with sex as they find it – I’m very happy for them.

But are they really? Or are they simply more accepting?

A woman in her early thirties said that she didn’t see the point of sex Continue reading

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Men hope a lover will enhance their sexual arousal

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The sex industry (pros­ti­tu­tion and porno­graphy) is a clear indic­a­tion that men’s desire to enjoy their own sexual arousal and orgasm cannot be satis­fied through their rela­tion­ships with women alone.

It’s easy for a woman to figure out that men want sex… but they also want to be loved and appre­ci­ated through their sexual relationship.

  • Men’s sexual arousal is usually easy and imme­diate. Despite the evidence

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Sex for life

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One great aspect of men growing older is that they become slightly less obsessed with their own sexual arousal and need for sexual release. Now that his own need for orgasm is less pressing, my partner is able to focus on my arousal and can bring me to orgasm through using a combin­a­tion of anal and clit­oral stimulation.

As a young woman I was never conscious of my Continue reading

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Men are fascinated by sex

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When I was seeing Bruce, a sexual psycho­lo­gist, Peter also went along for one session by himself. It was a rare oppor­tunity for two men to compare notes on tech­niques for female sexual arousal.

Peter told Bruce how he had masturb­ated a woman on a transat­lantic flight. He had told her about some sexual fantasy scen­arios while stim­u­lating her clit­oris. Appar­ently, Bruce was very impressed with Continue reading

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Men’s sexual fantasies

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In pursuit of know­ledge and under­standing of sexual arousal, I went to a large news­agent in London’s Oxford Street to review the covers of fifty or more porno­graphic magazines lined up on the top shelf. Over 90% were directed towards hetero­sexual men. Most of the remainder was male homo­sexual porno­graphy. The few porno­graphic magazines for women were for lesbians.

Although porno­graphy is labelled ‘adult’ as if this is Continue reading

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The marvel of male sexuality

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The film ‘The Way We Were’ (1973) stars Barbra Streisand and Robert Redford (the Brad Pitt of my mother’s generation).

She’s the young woman from a humble back­ground driven by polit­ical ideals; he’s the young man from a priv­ileged family who has no ideals. Of course she’s a virgin and she ends up one night with him in the bed naked. He’s so drunk that he’s just thrown up Continue reading

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Men’s sexual arousal is usually easy

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Young men wake up each morning with an erec­tion and have spon­tan­eous erec­tions throughout the day as sex-related thoughts occur to them or simply as a result of seeing someone they find attractive. A boy has no choice but to learn about his sexual arousal and orgasm but, for women, learning how to orgasm is a much more conscious process.

“What’s pink and hard first thing in Continue reading

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Male sexuality involves a high sex drive

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Faking illus­trates how women are more concerned about keeping their part­ners happy or not appearing inad­equate than they are about reaching orgasm. Other­wise, they would admit their problem and try to find a solution.

Like­wise, the debate over which body part needs to be stim­u­lated for female orgasm arises because many women don’t know how to orgasm.

It is unthink­able that a man would not Continue reading

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Holding men responsible for women’s sexual arousal

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Men are often blamed, unfairly, for the diffi­culties that women have with orgasm during sex. For example, it is suggested that, by coming too soon, a man fails to provide enough stimulation.

In fact, inter­course is unlikely to provide women with enough clit­oral stim­u­la­tion regard­less of how long the man keeps thrusting for.

“Closely linked with the tradi­tional pres­sure on men to main­tain long erec­tion Continue reading

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How men appreciate sex and love

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My mother never talked to me much about sex but she did tell me to respect a man’s sexual ego. She believed that a man’s sexual perform­ance relies on a sens­itive lover who under­stands how to play to a man’s sexual fantasies.

A man hopes for a lover who is enthu­si­astic about sharing phys­ical intimacy and their intimate time together as lovers. Essen­tially, sex is no fun if Continue reading

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