Comments on: Very few women talk about orgasm http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/ The female sexuality forum dedicated to discussing women's orgasm techniques Fri, 03 Feb 2012 09:03:02 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Janehttp://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-168 Jane Sat, 07 Jan 2012 22:46:08 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-168 Thanks for your support. Yes I understand that such things are private. But I find it strange that so few women want to talk about the pleasures of orgasm. Men certainly express their enjoyment of sex. It would seem that relatively few women discover the joys of the clitoris. Thanks for your support.

Yes I understand that such things are private. But I find it strange that so few women want to talk about the pleasures of orgasm.

Men certainly express their enjoyment of sex. It would seem that relatively few women discover the joys of the clitoris.

]]> By: vauldinehttp://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-167 vauldine Sat, 07 Jan 2012 21:29:12 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-167 I guess they believe that is private! I guess they believe that is private!

]]> By: Janehttp://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-165 Jane Sat, 07 Jan 2012 20:37:33 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-165 I am not saying that women cannot 'enjoy sex'. I am asking how women experience sexual arousal and orgasm. There is plenty of evidence to show that women have more difficulty enjoying sexual arousal and orgasm during sex. There is also evidence to show that female orgasm is much easier to achieve through masturbation alone. These are the facts. If you dispute them perhaps you can provide your facts, evidence or quote an expert conclusion. I don't believe that women have been especially repressed or suppressed in the past or now. Women simply don't have anything like the sex drive that men have. I have masturabated regularly since 17, keep a library of erotic literature and sex manuals, watch porn movies with my partner and engage on regular sex sessions with my partner. I don't meet many women with the same level of interest in sex. My partners have all masturbated from a much younger age and on a daily basis. They want sex pretty much all the time. I have never been able to enjoy the same sexual arousal and orgasm with a partner as I do during masturbation. I am not saying that women can't enjoy sex but that I don't understand HOW they can enjoy sex when they are so easily offended by pornography or any explicit sexual reference. Most women I talk to are not interested in orgasm and very few think that masturbation is normal for women. I am talking about normal everyday women you might meet in the supermarket etc. not just your mates. If all your friends masturbate and you all talk openly about how you achieve orgasm with a partner then there are many women out there (including myself) who would like to know how you achieve this. I am not saying that women cannot ‘enjoy sex’. I am asking how women experience sexual arousal and orgasm. There is plenty of evidence to show that women have more difficulty enjoying sexual arousal and orgasm during sex. There is also evidence to show that female orgasm is much easier to achieve through masturbation alone.

These are the facts. If you dispute them perhaps you can provide your facts, evidence or quote an expert conclusion. I don’t believe that women have been especially repressed or suppressed in the past or now. Women simply don’t have anything like the sex drive that men have.

I have masturabated regularly since 17, keep a library of erotic literature and sex manuals, watch porn movies with my partner and engage on regular sex sessions with my partner. I don’t meet many women with the same level of interest in sex. My partners have all masturbated from a much younger age and on a daily basis. They want sex pretty much all the time. I have never been able to enjoy the same sexual arousal and orgasm with a partner as I do during masturbation.

I am not saying that women can’t enjoy sex but that I don’t understand HOW they can enjoy sex when they are so easily offended by pornography or any explicit sexual reference. Most women I talk to are not interested in orgasm and very few think that masturbation is normal for women.

I am talking about normal everyday women you might meet in the supermarket etc. not just your mates. If all your friends masturbate and you all talk openly about how you achieve orgasm with a partner then there are many women out there (including myself) who would like to know how you achieve this.

]]> By: annabellewithcoffeehttp://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-164 annabellewithcoffee Sat, 07 Jan 2012 19:15:52 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-164 PS. After reading your comment(s), I thought I would add a bit more. You know, there is no getting around it--women have been sexually exploited and suppressed, and there is no doubt that much of these issues came about with religious thinking. The thing is, women lived very suppressed for centuries, and only at the turn of the 19th century did they even begin to enjoy some of the liberties that men did. So, right off the bat you are dealing with societal mores that helped to establish a woman's acceptance, and/or the allowance of any type of sexual freedom. For centuries, men have been allowed to have sexual relations with whomever and whenever. Even within the confines of religion, we see leaders, kings, artists, noblemen, etc. talk and experience a much more open, freer mindset. Literary scholars like Shakespeare even humorously addressed the sexual suppression of women in plays like, "The Taming of the Shrew," and "As You Like It," etc. The thing is--while it is certain women have been suppressed in this arena, there are basic psychological differences in the way that men and women experience arousal, but to assume that "nature" never intended for a woman to organism during sex is a bit harsh. I think perhaps you are trying to compare apples and oranges. Men and women can "both" enjoy sex, but the way they experience it, and how this plays out is always going to be different, because they are simply not the same physiologically or emotionally. If masturbation is part of the woman's experience or process to climax, then that's ok. You also mention,"I am very happy to believe that women are sexual, interested in sex and enthusiastic about sex. It's just that none of these women is willing to discuss their experiences in detail." I am curious. Based on this comment and your reference to women never talking about how they actually achieve orgasm, etc., how many men actually sit around and discuss how they achieved orgasm? I mean, when a man says, "I'm turned on," we all know what that means. We might find a man discussing his every play in the middle of a locker room, but it's doubtful that he is going to talk about his foreplay, or his masturbating techniques at a dinner party. Doubtful that this guy is going to freely discuss his fantasies at a business luncheon. Yes, I do agree with you that women's sexuality has been grossly understated, and that they have not had the same liberties as men, but I do not agree with you that women are not supposed to enjoy sex. PS. After reading your comment(s), I thought I would add a bit more. You know, there is no getting around it–women have been sexually exploited and suppressed, and there is no doubt that much of these issues came about with religious thinking. The thing is, women lived very suppressed for centuries, and only at the turn of the 19th century did they even begin to enjoy some of the liberties that men did. So, right off the bat you are dealing with societal mores that helped to establish a woman’s acceptance, and/or the allowance of any type of sexual freedom. For centuries, men have been allowed to have sexual relations with whomever and whenever. Even within the confines of religion, we see leaders, kings, artists, noblemen, etc. talk and experience a much more open, freer mindset. Literary scholars like Shakespeare even humorously addressed the sexual suppression of women in plays like, “The Taming of the Shrew,” and “As You Like It,” etc.

The thing is–while it is certain women have been suppressed in this arena, there are basic psychological differences in the way that men and women experience arousal, but to assume that “nature” never intended for a woman to organism during sex is a bit harsh. I think perhaps you are trying to compare apples and oranges. Men and women can “both” enjoy sex, but the way they experience it, and how this plays out is always going to be different, because they are simply not the same physiologically or emotionally. If masturbation is part of the woman’s experience or process to climax, then that’s ok.

You also mention,“I am very happy to believe that women are sexual, interested in sex and enthusiastic about sex. It’s just that none of these women is willing to discuss their experiences in detail.” I am curious. Based on this comment and your reference to women never talking about how they actually achieve orgasm, etc., how many men actually sit around and discuss how they achieved orgasm? I mean, when a man says, “I’m turned on,” we all know what that means. We might find a man discussing his every play in the middle of a locker room, but it’s doubtful that he is going to talk about his foreplay, or his masturbating techniques at a dinner party. Doubtful that this guy is going to freely discuss his fantasies at a business luncheon.

Yes, I do agree with you that women’s sexuality has been grossly understated, and that they have not had the same liberties as men, but I do not agree with you that women are not supposed to enjoy sex.

]]> By: annabellewithcoffeehttp://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-163 annabellewithcoffee Sat, 07 Jan 2012 18:33:34 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-163 Interesting topic. Here's the deal--I think women today are much more aware of their bodies than say even 20 years ago. Your quote,“Many women find it very difficult to talk about sex with their male partners. More than a quarter of the women with whom I have discussed the subject say that they never talk to their partners about things they might do to improve lovemaking.” (p117 Woman’s Experience of Sex 1983)" is a bit dated. A lot has changed over the last 27 years. Women have become sexually emancipated in a sense. What no one would talk about 20 + years ago, people talk about openly now. Just look at television commercials. In the past 10 years alone they have become much more sexual. Face it, sex (whether we like it or not) sells. 25 years ago, no one would think of going to a sex therapist, and today this is a booming field! I am not 25 years old, and I do have a few girlfriends I can freely discuss masturbation with--even in the context of what works in bed, etc. And of these friends... all (most of who are in committed relationships or marriages), admit to enjoying sex immensely. I think the topic is interesting, but the angle is a bit dated. Interesting topic. Here’s the deal–I think women today are much more aware of their bodies than say even 20 years ago. Your quote,“Many women find it very difficult to talk about sex with their male partners. More than a quarter of the women with whom I have discussed the subject say that they never talk to their partners about things they might do to improve lovemaking.” (p117 Woman’s Experience of Sex 1983)” is a bit dated. A lot has changed over the last 27 years. Women have become sexually emancipated in a sense. What no one would talk about 20 + years ago, people talk about openly now. Just look at television commercials. In the past 10 years alone they have become much more sexual. Face it, sex (whether we like it or not) sells. 25 years ago, no one would think of going to a sex therapist, and today this is a booming field! I am not 25 years old, and I do have a few girlfriends I can freely discuss masturbation with–even in the context of what works in bed, etc. And of these friends… all (most of who are in committed relationships or marriages), admit to enjoying sex immensely. I think the topic is interesting, but the angle is a bit dated.

]]> By: Janehttp://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-161 Jane Sat, 07 Jan 2012 16:46:03 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-161 Thanks for bringing a little humour to the discussion - I assume you are male. You can laugh (and rightly too because this subject all too often causes people to lose their sense of humour) but women have much more difficulty understanding their sexuality than men typically do. The false images all over the media and throughout erotic fiction portraying women as easily orgasmic make it difficult for women to discuss their sexuality openly. Real women feel sexually inadequate when compared to these much more appealing images of 'sexual' women. Very few women are confident of how orgasm is achieved. Most who are base their knowledge of orgasm on their experience of masturbation. Such women are today categorised as sexually dysfunctional. This is wrong because they are, in fact, only women who are sexually experienced enough to know that orgasm is missing from sex with a partner. Thanks for bringing a little humour to the discussion — I assume you are male.

You can laugh (and rightly too because this subject all too often causes people to lose their sense of humour) but women have much more difficulty understanding their sexuality than men typically do.

The false images all over the media and throughout erotic fiction portraying women as easily orgasmic make it difficult for women to discuss their sexuality openly. Real women feel sexually inadequate when compared to these much more appealing images of ‘sexual’ women.

Very few women are confident of how orgasm is achieved. Most who are base their knowledge of orgasm on their experience of masturbation. Such women are today categorised as sexually dysfunctional. This is wrong because they are, in fact, only women who are sexually experienced enough to know that orgasm is missing from sex with a partner.

]]> By: Sagetahttp://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-162 Sageta Sat, 07 Jan 2012 15:27:43 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-162 I feel I can talk about arousal very easily I feel I can talk about arousal very easily

]]> By: Janehttp://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-160 Jane Sat, 07 Jan 2012 15:11:20 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-160 Thanks for all the comments. I am often told that I have managed to find only women of an incredibly rare type over the last ten years and more. Apparently no one else has the same experience of talking to women about sex. I am very happy to believe that women are sexual, interested in sex and enthusiastic about sex. It's just that none of these women is willing to discuss their experiences in detail. So far they all prefer to make comments full of bravado but it is not clear that they even know what orgasm is because they are not willing to explain how they achieve it. I have been talking to women in everyday life - very different to surveys of women who want to publicise their sexual experiences. This website has also had 50-100 visitors a day for over a year now but so far very few women are willing to be specific. A couple of women have been hugely defensive and have insisted that women enjoy sex as much as men do. They have no answers for why women rarely masturbate, rarely use pornography and rarely pay for sex. Some suggest that women are repressed (by men) and others that women don't have as much money as men (for a porn mag...?). Often when women say that they enjoy sex, they then talk about love. They seem confused when I ask about sexual arousal and orgasm. One woman thought it was a trick question. I'm simply saying if sex is so good then what is good - is it just 'love' or is there something more? If there is something more (e.g. true sexual arousal), why all the secrecy and embarrassment? Why not share the techniques that women use for orgasm? I'm just pointing out that women don't talk about these things because they are not confident of their experiences of sexual arousal and orgasm. Please direct all the sexually confident women you know to my website or to this discussion. So far, no woman has been able to explain how she achieves sexual arousal with a lover. Women do not become aroused enough for orgasm by simply looking at the naked male body. If they did, they would buy porn mags (these are available because male homosexual porn is full of male gentials). Thanks for all the comments.

I am often told that I have managed to find only women of an incredibly rare type over the last ten years and more. Apparently no one else has the same experience of talking to women about sex.

I am very happy to believe that women are sexual, interested in sex and enthusiastic about sex. It’s just that none of these women is willing to discuss their experiences in detail.

So far they all prefer to make comments full of bravado but it is not clear that they even know what orgasm is because they are not willing to explain how they achieve it.

I have been talking to women in everyday life — very different to surveys of women who want to publicise their sexual experiences. This website has also had 50–100 visitors a day for over a year now but so far very few women are willing to be specific.

A couple of women have been hugely defensive and have insisted that women enjoy sex as much as men do. They have no answers for why women rarely masturbate, rarely use pornography and rarely pay for sex. Some suggest that women are repressed (by men) and others that women don’t have as much money as men (for a porn mag…?).

Often when women say that they enjoy sex, they then talk about love. They seem confused when I ask about sexual arousal and orgasm. One woman thought it was a trick question. I’m simply saying if sex is so good then what is good — is it just ‘love’ or is there something more?

If there is something more (e.g. true sexual arousal), why all the secrecy and embarrassment? Why not share the techniques that women use for orgasm? I’m just pointing out that women don’t talk about these things because they are not confident of their experiences of sexual arousal and orgasm.

Please direct all the sexually confident women you know to my website or to this discussion. So far, no woman has been able to explain how she achieves sexual arousal with a lover.

Women do not become aroused enough for orgasm by simply looking at the naked male body. If they did, they would buy porn mags (these are available because male homosexual porn is full of male gentials).

]]> By: mona37http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-159 mona37 Sat, 07 Jan 2012 14:22:53 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-159 well this for sure highlights a whole different aspects but it really comes down to one thing- if you know how to communicate it and get it right out of your man! well this for sure highlights a whole different aspects but it really comes down to one thing– if you know how to communicate it and get it right out of your man!

]]> By: Ibrahim_mahmoodhttp://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/very-few-women-talk-about-orgasm/#comment-158 Ibrahim_mahmood Sat, 07 Jan 2012 13:35:30 +0000 http://www.wayswomenorgasm.org/?p=12657#comment-158 i think this goes both ways...few men can talk openly with their partners....its a shame really because in this game, one gets whatever one gives ! i think this goes both ways…few men can talk openly with their partners.…its a shame really because in this game, one gets whatever one gives !

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