After finding no answers from talking to experts, I decided to do my own research by talking to women I came across in everyday life.
I wrote about some of my experiences and conclusions and then asked women whether they would be willing to read what I had written.
If sex is so equal then why would anyone need to pay for sex? Prostitution exists because men’s drive to enjoy sexual pleasure cannot always be satisfied through relationships.
Most women interpret their sexual experiences in emotional terms as ‘making love’. Consequently, wives and girlfriends are often reluctant to offer more sexually explicit sexual pleasuring.
Naturally, some women insist that they are just as sexually driven as men. Even today when pornography dominates 90% of the Internet, women remain incredibly naive about men’s passion for sex.
One woman said: “The basics are this: men like sex and will give affection to get it. Women like affection, and get it during sex. It works out well for both.
Sex does not stand alone in a relationship and in long-term sexual relationships couples need to invest in quality time together.
The candle-lit dinners, soft music and flowers we tend to associate with romance provide the backdrop for the companionable aspects of a relationship.
A young woman, who had promised her father that she would remain a virgin until a certain age, complied with his request by having anal sex with her partners (Note: STD protection and contraceptives still required).
Unsurprisingly, she was very popular with men who tend not to be so hung-up about breaking sexual taboos.
Tracy Cox (author of ‘Hot Sex’ 1998) tells the story of a woman who welcomes her partner home wearing a sexy nightdress, with champagne by the bed and a pornographic movie ready to play. If she does this regularly over the longer term then I take my hat off to her!
Her partner is a very lucky man.
Slowly attitudes to sexual pleasure are changing and more couples are approaching their sex life with a willingness to try activities other than vaginal intercourse.
Basically, if you are struggling with lack of arousal during sex and genuinely want to share your own arousal with a partner then you will need to be prepared to explore activities other than intercourse.
Make a special effort once in a while to