After finding no answers from talking to experts, I decided to do my own research by talking to women I came across in everyday life.
I wrote about some of my experiences and conclusions and then asked women whether they would be willing to read what I had written.
Men tell me how convinced they are that ALL their partners orgasm during sex. But that’s kind of what faking orgasm is about, isn’t it?
If it wasn’t convincing then what would be the point? Men should sleep with women who are less sexually experienced.
In the film ‘True Lies’ (1994) Jamie Lee Curtis, as the dowdy housewife turned spy in the role of a prostitute, performs a sexy pole dance for her screen husband Arnold Schwarzenegger.
It seems so natural that a man’s arousal comes from admiring a woman’s body. Yet we never question why a man’s foreplay techniques do not include him using his body to provide a woman’s arousal.
A young and sexy woman complained about the male attention she got every time she left the hostel on 42nd Street, Manhattan, dressed in her high heels and low cleavage. Yes, well… It is relatively easy for a woman to attract a man’s attention by enhancing her looks.
It is more difficult for her to cash in on the advantage by enjoying orgasm during sex.
In the film ‘Private Benjamin’, a group of female army recruits sits around a campfire during an overnight exercise.
One of the women says: “I had an orgasm once…” and the others giggle. She goes on to say in a disappointed tone “…but I was alone!” Her girlfriends laugh sympathetically.
In the film, Goldie Hawn plays a spoilt young woman approaching thirty who has been married twice.
Some people assert confidently that women orgasm easily during sex. Yet, when I ask for details, the responses are frustratingly vague and defensive.
Many people assume that all women ‘naturally’ orgasm during sex. I have been advised to read a sex manual as if only extreme ignorance can explain a lack of orgasm.
Caroline lived on a farm as a child and was fortunate in having innocent and light-hearted sexual experiences as she grew up. Even as kids they would play the ‘I’ll show you mine if you show me yours’ game on the bus ride to school.
Her mother insisted that Caroline went on the pill at sixteen. She was not bothered about the sex.