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Tag Archives: Orgasm techniques
Reaching orgasm
Rose was a pretty woman even in her late forties. Despite being a mother and housewife she always achieved a classy presentation. Rose told me:
“Although I masturbated as a youngster (from 14) it was never to orgasm. My first orgasm was by accident. It happened at 17 with a boyfriend — not during penetrative sex but as a result of my body rubbing against his body. It Continue reading
How we enjoy our best orgasms
Shere Hite identified two main approaches that women used to increase clitoral stimulation and their chances of orgasm during intercourse. They either maximised DIRECT clitoral stimulation by using masturbation during sex or they used positions and techniques for sexual intercourse that maximised INDIRECT clitoral stimulation caused by the penis thrusting into the vagina.
“… orgasm is most likely to come when the woman takes over responsibility for Continue reading
Clitoral stimulation is not everything
As long ago as the 1950s the clitoris, and not the vagina, was acknowledged to be the origin of female orgasm. So that by the 1960s when Masters and Johnson explained female orgasm from intercourse alone, it was in terms of women finding positions and techniques for sexual intercourse that maximise the indirect clitoral stimulation (caused by the penis thrusting into the vagina).
As sex therapist Continue reading
Men’s sexual fantasies
In pursuit of knowledge and understanding of sexual arousal, I went to a large newsagent in London’s Oxford Street to review the covers of fifty or more pornographic magazines lined up on the top shelf. Over 90% were directed towards heterosexual men. Most of the remainder was male homosexual pornography. The few pornographic magazines for women were for lesbians.
Although pornography is labelled ‘adult’ as if this is Continue reading
Transferring masturbation techniques to sex
Caroline lived on a farm as a child and was fortunate in having innocent and light-hearted sexual experiences as she grew up. Even as kids they would play the ‘I’ll show you mine if you show me yours’ game on the bus ride to school.
Her mother insisted that Caroline went on the pill at sixteen. She was not bothered about the sex. She simply wanted Caroline to be Continue reading
Men’s sexual arousal is usually easy
Young men wake up each morning with an erection and have spontaneous erections throughout the day as sex-related thoughts occur to them or simply as a result of seeing someone they find attractive. A boy has no choice but to learn about his sexual arousal and orgasm but, for women, learning how to orgasm is a much more conscious process.
“What’s pink and hard first thing in Continue reading
Very few women talk about orgasm
After finding no answers from talking to experts, I decided to do my own research by talking to women I came across in everyday life.
I wrote about some of my experiences and conclusions and then asked women whether they would be willing to read what I had written. I made it clear that there was no obligation for reviewers to comment.
The first point to note Continue reading
Difficulties in applying orgasm techniques to sex
Women’s orgasm techniques leant from masturbation (including both clitoral stimulation and use of sexual fantasies) are not always as easy to transfer to sex with a partner as experts imply.
Sexual pleasure
Self-evidently there are ‘responsible’ aspects of sex as well as the ‘pleasurable’ but sexual ignorance is of no use to anyone.
Young women today are more likely to end up pregnant as a result of pressure from men or from idealised images of motherhood than from any hope of enjoying sexual pleasure. Providing girls with information about their sexuality is an important part of giving women the Continue reading