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I approached my adult life in anticipation of a mutually enjoyable sex life. This optimism was fuelled by my love of erotic literature, which I read avidly as a teenager. I enjoyed exploring my sexual fantasies and by the...

How we enjoy our best orgasms

Shere Hite identified two main approaches that women used to increase clitoral stimulation and their chances of orgasm during intercourse. They either maximised DIRECT...

Women have to learn how their sexual arousal works

Some women appear to be so sheltered from the world of adult eroticism that one wonders if they have ever experienced sexual urges of...

Sexual arousal from romantic emotions

Many women talk about sexual arousal and orgasm in terms of their relationship. They describe their loving feelings for their partner and explain their...

Women often assume sexual arousal during sex

Unless they masturbate, most women are unaware that clitoral stimulation is needed for female orgasm. Equally, they are unaware that before genital stimulation can...

Why sex is called ‘making love’

The heterosexual act of vaginal intercourse is designed foremost as an expression of love between a man and a woman. After all, if sex was...

Lack of arousal during sex

Intimacy with a lover causes me to feel affectionate but I am rarely conscious of any sexual arousal. Whether it's sex with a partner,...

Real female orgasms

In the film ‘Private Benjamin’, a group of female army recruits sits around a campfire during an overnight exercise. One of the women says: “I...

The facts of female sexuality

Shere Hite pointed out in 1976 that intercourse does not provide the specific clitoral stimulation that women need to orgasm. So, it is very...

Transferring masturbation techniques to sex

Caroline lived on a farm as a child and was fortunate in having innocent and light-hearted sexual experiences as she grew up. Even as...

The ideal male lover

Alex Comfort's book 'The Joy of Sex' (1972) documented primarily positions for intercourse that he and his mistress had found pleasurable as part of...

How to enjoy your sexual fantasies

Women use clitoral stimulation during female masturbation but that's just dessert. Main course is achieving sexual arousal though sexual fantasies. Many women never learn...

Eroticism

Men and women live in different worlds when it comes to attitudes to eroticism. I suggested that most women today know how to pleasure...

Sexual relationships favour male orgasm

Let's discuss enjoying sex play (7)

Some women do explore sexual pleasure

Slowly attitudes to sexual pleasure are changing and more couples are approaching their sex life with a willingness to try activities other than vaginal...

Spice up your sex life

A young woman, who had promised her father that she would remain a virgin until a certain age, complied with his request by having...

Men’s sexual fantasies

In pursuit of knowledge and understanding of sexual arousal, I went to a large newsagent in London’s Oxford Street to review the covers of...

Men’s sexual arousal is usually easy

Young men wake up each morning with an erection and have spontaneous erections throughout the day as sex-related thoughts occur to them or simply...

Is sexual arousal with a partner really so easy?

I approached my adult life in anticipation of a mutually enjoyable sex life. This optimism was fuelled by my love of erotic literature, which...

Bluffers, fakers and sex surveys

Pam, an attractive woman in her late forties, told me that she had never had a problem with sexual arousal and orgasm. She started...

What sex experts have told me

When my partner and I decided to get married, his work-mates took him out for a beer to convince him that marriage would mean...

How do women reach orgasm with a partner?

Everyone says "but it all works fine for other women". My question is "How?" Men have more testosterone. Men get turned on by anything that...

Female orgasm is not required for reproduction

We have known for decades that intercourse doesn't provide sufficient PHYSICAL stimulation (of the clitoris) for orgasm. But even more fundamentally, how do women...