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Sex advice for women is often misleading

Natalie, a woman in her late twenties, had a close relationship with her mother who was a doctor. I approached Natalie hoping that a...
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Female Masturbation

Female masturbation is relatively uncommon

Carolyn, a relationship counsellor in her fifties, told me she thought it unwise to positively encourage female masturbation. She did not give her reasons. “Many...

Women’s sex drive to orgasm during sex

Becky explained via e-mail: “I had my first orgasm at 26 during masturbation - pretty late I know & since then no stopping me...

Sexual Arousal

Women’s sexual arousal

Published in 1972, ‘Joy of Sex’ by Alex Comfort MD was revolutionary at the time because it suggested a new openness and a sense...

Why sexual arousal is more elusive for women

Sexual desire is associated with ‘sex drive’. The male sex drive is a man’s biological drive to procreate by thrusting into a woman’s vagina...

Emotional Initimacy

Women settle for emotional intimacy over sexual arousal

On relating our experience to others, we all tend to gloss over details or not own up to difficulties that were perhaps transient. I told...

Clitoral Stimulation

The ‘non-genital’ female orgasm

In response to my suggestion that it was ridiculous to suggest that a man can give a woman an orgasm, a man wrote: "My wife...

Lack of arousal during sex

Intimacy with a lover causes me to feel affectionate but I am rarely conscious of any sexual arousal. Whether it's sex with a partner,...

Women’s sexual dysfunction

Although many sources refer to women's 'sexual dysfunction', it is rare to find a definition of what is supposed to be sexually ‘normal’ for...

Orgasm Techniques

Difficulties in applying orgasm techniques to sex

Women’s orgasm techniques leant from masturbation (including both clitoral stimulation and use of sexual fantasies) are not always as easy to transfer to sex...

The ideal male lover

Alex Comfort's book 'The Joy of Sex' (1972) documented primarily positions for intercourse that he and his mistress had found pleasurable as part of...

Sexual Fantasies

How to give a woman an orgasm during sex

The suggestion is that for the perfect sex life a woman just needs to find the right man: usually a loving and considerate partner,...

Enjoying Sex Play

Women who enjoy their own sexual arousal

Perhaps it would be simpler if I explained that I am targeting women who masturbate regularly in order to enjoy their own sexual arousal...

Sexual relationships favour male orgasm

Let's discuss enjoying sex play (7)

Physical Intimacy

Emotional intimacy may lead to physical intimacy

Sex does not stand alone in a relationship and in long-term sexual relationships couples need to invest in quality time together. The candle-lit dinners, soft...

Sexual pleasure

Self-evidently there are ‘responsible’ aspects of sex as well as the ‘pleasurable’ but sexual ignorance is of no use to anyone. Young women today are...

Understanding Men

The marvel of male sexuality

The film 'The Way We Were' (1973) stars Barbra Streisand and Robert Redford (the Brad Pitt of my mother's generation). She's the young woman from a...

Sex for life

One great aspect of men growing older is that they become slightly less obsessed with their own sexual arousal and need for sexual release....

Misconceptions

Bluffers, fakers and sex surveys

Pam, an attractive woman in her late forties, told me that she had never had a problem with sexual arousal and orgasm. She started...

Interpreting experiences of female orgasm

When a man is stimulated sexually by a partner he finds it difficult to avoid becoming aroused. Similarly, if a woman’s response to penile...

Modern Sex Advice

The truth about female sexuality

Sex is a difficult subject to analyse because it relies on our emotions rather than our powers of logical reasoning. How many women have...

Bringing more realism to sex advice

It is natural that female sexuality is misrepresented by the media. We all watch films and read books in part to be entertained. We...

Sexual Desire

Women’s sexual desire

Women who live alone or do not have an active sex life with their partner sometimes perceive themselves to be sexually needy because they...