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I approached my adult life in anticipation of a mutually enjoyable sex life. This optimism was fuelled by my love of erotic literature, which...

Comparing orgasm from female masturbation and with a partner

Graphs are not very exciting concepts but nevertheless they can be useful. Imagine the male orgasm graph which looks a little like a vertical...

How a woman can learn to masturbate

If a woman is open-minded to the idea of exploring eroticism, she should start by reading some erotic literature. I suggest: 'Emmanuelle' by Emmanuelle...

Women often assume sexual arousal during sex

Unless they masturbate, most women are unaware that clitoral stimulation is needed for female orgasm. Equally, they are unaware that before genital stimulation can...

Sexual arousal from romantic emotions

Many women talk about sexual arousal and orgasm in terms of their relationship. They describe their loving feelings for their partner and explain their...

Sheltering young women from eroticism

Reading the word ‘sexy’, a boy of nine screwed up his face in a gesture of disgust and said “Yuck!”. I asked him why...

Real female orgasms

In the film ‘Private Benjamin’, a group of female army recruits sits around a campfire during an overnight exercise. One of the women says: “I...

Understanding the G-spot

The Gräfenberg Spot, or G-Spot, has been surrounded by controversy ever since its ‘discovery’ only decades ago. Some women may have one about an...

Lack of arousal during sex

Intimacy with a lover causes me to feel affectionate but I am rarely conscious of any sexual arousal. Whether it's sex with a partner,...

True female sexual arousal and orgasm

Any talk of sexual arousal and orgasm, usually focuses on women since men's sexual arousal and orgasm tend to be a given. It is unthinkable...

The ideal male lover

Alex Comfort's book 'The Joy of Sex' (1972) documented primarily positions for intercourse that he and his mistress had found pleasurable as part of...

Clitoral stimulation is not everything

As long ago as the 1950s the clitoris, and not the vagina, was acknowledged to be the origin of female orgasm. So that by...

Eroticism

Men and women live in different worlds when it comes to attitudes to eroticism. I suggested that most women today know how to pleasure...

Pleasuring a woman

An erection might feel good but it is likely to be a disadvantage if a man wants to devote time to pleasuring a woman....

Some women do explore sexual pleasure

Slowly attitudes to sexual pleasure are changing and more couples are approaching their sex life with a willingness to try activities other than vaginal...

Sexual pleasure

Self-evidently there are ‘responsible’ aspects of sex as well as the ‘pleasurable’ but sexual ignorance is of no use to anyone. Young women today are...

Sex for life

One great aspect of men growing older is that they become slightly less obsessed with their own sexual arousal and need for sexual release....

How men appreciate sex and love

My mother never talked to me much about sex but she did tell me to respect a man's sexual ego. She believed that a...

Talking to women about female orgasm

Since the experts I talked to had no rational explanations, I decided to do my own research by talking to women I met in...

Taking the ego out of sex advice

Why do adults so often assume that they know everything about sex when most people have never even read a sex manual? Everyone is entitled...

Explanations for women’s sexual arousal

Some people assert confidently that women orgasm easily during sex. Yet, when I ask for details, the responses are frustratingly vague and defensive. Many people...

Defending the modern image of female sexuality

As a young woman I never understood why I did not experience sexual arousal as a natural part of my sexual relationship. Much later...

Women’s sexual desire

Women who live alone or do not have an active sex life with their partner sometimes perceive themselves to be sexually needy because they...