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In pursuit of knowledge and understanding of sexual arousal, I went to a large newsagent in London’s Oxford Street to review the covers of...

Comparing orgasm from female masturbation and with a partner

Graphs are not very exciting concepts but nevertheless they can be useful. Imagine the male orgasm graph which looks a little like a vertical...

Female masturbation is relatively uncommon

Carolyn, a relationship counsellor in her fifties, told me she thought it unwise to positively encourage female masturbation. She did not give her reasons. “Many...

Sexual arousal from romantic emotions

Many women talk about sexual arousal and orgasm in terms of their relationship. They describe their loving feelings for their partner and explain their...

Why sexual arousal is more elusive for women

Sexual desire is associated with ‘sex drive’. The male sex drive is a man’s biological drive to procreate by thrusting into a woman’s vagina...

Sheltering young women from eroticism

Reading the word ‘sexy’, a boy of nine screwed up his face in a gesture of disgust and said “Yuck!”. I asked him why...

Lack of arousal during sex

Intimacy with a lover causes me to feel affectionate but I am rarely conscious of any sexual arousal. Whether it's sex with a partner,...

What if female sexuality truly equalled male sexuality?

Imagine the scenario: a man and a woman facing each other, naked, in a world where men and women have an identical sex drive. So,...

Most women are not aiming for orgasm through genital stimulation

Some women refer to 'making love' because the term more accurately describes their motives in terms of loving emotions rather than as an explicit...

Positions and techniques for sexual intercourse

Shere Hite explained in the 1970s how the women in her surveys reached orgasm during sex. She compared women’s success with orgasm during masturbation...

The ideal male lover

Alex Comfort's book 'The Joy of Sex' (1972) documented primarily positions for intercourse that he and his mistress had found pleasurable as part of...

How women enjoy eroticism through sex stories

Most heterosexual women do not masturbate. They also do not find the concepts of eroticism or fantasy that appealing. So who reads all the...

How do women achieve sexual arousal during sex?

Some women happily accept the modern media's portrayal of women as complete sexual beings, for whom spontaneously orgasmic sex is as much of a...

Eroticism

Men and women live in different worlds when it comes to attitudes to eroticism. I suggested that most women today know how to pleasure...

Some women do explore sexual pleasure

Slowly attitudes to sexual pleasure are changing and more couples are approaching their sex life with a willingness to try activities other than vaginal...

How to pleasure a man

Tracy Cox (author of ‘Hot Sex’ 1998) tells the story of a woman who welcomes her partner home wearing a sexy nightdress, with champagne...

Male sexuality involves a high sex drive

Faking illustrates how women are more concerned about keeping their partners happy or not appearing inadequate than they are about reaching orgasm. Otherwise, they...

Long-term sexual relationships

Why in our liberated times do women still accept ‘putting up with sex’ just to avoid being single? I am not judging anyone else’s...

Taking the ego out of sex advice

Why do adults so often assume that they know everything about sex when most people have never even read a sex manual? Everyone is entitled...

Interpreting experiences of female orgasm

When a man is stimulated sexually by a partner he finds it difficult to avoid becoming aroused. Similarly, if a woman’s response to penile...

Explanations for women’s sexual arousal

Some people assert confidently that women orgasm easily during sex. Yet, when I ask for details, the responses are frustratingly vague and defensive. Many people...

Sex advice for women is often misleading

Natalie, a woman in her late twenties, had a close relationship with her mother who was a doctor. I approached Natalie hoping that a...

A sexual relationship

Judy married in the late 1950s; well before the average woman was informed about what a sexual relationship might involve. Judy’s aspirations were to provide...