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Talking to women about female orgasm

Since the experts I talked to had no rational explanations, I decided to do my own research by talking to women I met in...
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Female Masturbation

Female masturbation is relatively uncommon

Carolyn, a relationship counsellor in her fifties, told me she thought it unwise to positively encourage female masturbation. She did not give her reasons. “Many...

Techniques women use to reach orgasm

I'm sure that men will understand the point. We express our sexuality through two basic phenomena: Firstly, enjoying our own PSYCHOLOGICAL arousal by appreciating...

Sexual Arousal

Sexual arousal from romantic emotions

Many women talk about sexual arousal and orgasm in terms of their relationship. They describe their loving feelings for their partner and explain their...

The mystery of female sexual arousal

In the film 'True Lies' (1994) Jamie Lee Curtis, as the dowdy housewife turned spy in the role of a prostitute, performs a sexy...

Emotional Initimacy

Why sex is called ‘making love’

The heterosexual act of vaginal intercourse is designed foremost as an expression of love between a man and a woman. After all, if sex was...

Clitoral Stimulation

Women’s sexual dysfunction

Although many sources refer to women's 'sexual dysfunction', it is rare to find a definition of what is supposed to be sexually ‘normal’ for...

The ‘non-genital’ female orgasm

In response to my suggestion that it was ridiculous to suggest that a man can give a woman an orgasm, a man wrote: "My wife...

Enjoying sexual pleasure

When it was suggested recently that UK schools should explain the role of the clitoris, mothers were up in arms. They objected to their...

Orgasm Techniques

Why foreplay techniques don’t always work as we think they should

Foreplay has evolved as a means of compensating women for the lack of clitoral stimulation during intercourse. The concept behind foreplay techniques (including clitoral...

Women’s sexual arousal tends to be assumed or overlooked

Much of what is known about female orgasm comes from women's experience of masturbation. Shere Hite’s work focused on female masturbation and the clitoris. As...

Sexual Fantasies

Arousal comes from appreciating eroticism

Our ability to become sexually aroused through an appreciation of eroticism is a normal as well as a necessary part of human sexuality. Sex...

Enjoying Sex Play

Pleasuring a woman

An erection might feel good but it is likely to be a disadvantage if a man wants to devote time to pleasuring a woman....

Why sex is fun

If the male sex drive only involved a desire for orgasm, then men would be happy settling for masturbation instead of sex. No doubt...

Physical Intimacy

Women who want to enjoy sexual pleasure

When I was growing up there was never any embarrassment over nudity at home. As divorcees, my parents naturally enjoyed sexual relationships with various...

Very few women talk about orgasm

After finding no answers from talking to experts, I decided to do my own research by talking to women I came across in everyday...

Understanding Men

Men’s sexual arousal is usually easy

Young men wake up each morning with an erection and have spontaneous erections throughout the day as sex-related thoughts occur to them or simply...

Holding men responsible for women’s sexual arousal

Men are often blamed, unfairly, for the difficulties that women have with orgasm during sex. For example, it is suggested that, by coming too...

Misconceptions

Women who appear to want sexual pleasure

When I was 21, I met an Italian boy of the same age during a stay in Rome. Alfredo cared about how he dressed...

Is sexual arousal with a partner really so easy?

I approached my adult life in anticipation of a mutually enjoyable sex life. This optimism was fuelled by my love of erotic literature, which...

Modern Sex Advice

Bringing more realism to sex advice

It is natural that female sexuality is misrepresented by the media. We all watch films and read books in part to be entertained. We...

The problem with sex advice today

The suggestion is that female sexuality is identical to male sexuality. Yet women don't approach sex with the same genital erection (of the clitoris)...

Sexual Desire

Women who fake orgasm

Men tell me how convinced they are that ALL their partners orgasm during sex. But that's kind of what faking orgasm is about, isn't it? If...