HomeReal Women

Real Women

Sexual arousal during intercourse

When I had sex for the first time, I was disappointed because I had hoped that sex would be spontaneously arousing enough for me...

Sex and love

A BBC documentary ‘The Human Body’ presented by Dr Robert Winston films a sex education class. First the teacher writes the word ‘SEX’ in...

Women’s sexual arousal

Published in 1972, ‘Joy of Sex’ by Alex Comfort MD was revolutionary at the time because it suggested a new openness and a sense...

Female sexuality in perspective

Humans are one of the few mammals known to have intercourse even when the female is not in estrus (the fertile period in the...

Female masturbation

As our bodies develop through puberty, young men and women become aware of themselves as very different sexual beings. Boys have erections as early as...

Understanding women’s sexual arousal

Sex is associated with reproduction and with pleasure. Male orgasm is usually co-incident with ejaculation which leads to reproduction but female orgasm is not...

How we enjoy our best orgasms

Shere Hite identified two main approaches that women used to increase clitoral stimulation and their chances of orgasm during intercourse. They either maximised DIRECT...

Comparing orgasm from female masturbation and with a partner

Graphs are not very exciting concepts but nevertheless they can be useful. Imagine the male orgasm graph which looks a little like a vertical...

How to use a vibrator to discover orgasm

Laura was educated and cultured but she also had a worldliness and the classy sex appeal that attracts the most ambitious men. In her...

How a woman can learn to masturbate

If a woman is open-minded to the idea of exploring eroticism, she should start by reading some erotic literature. I suggest: 'Emmanuelle' by Emmanuelle...

Techniques women use to reach orgasm

I'm sure that men will understand the point. We express our sexuality through two basic phenomena: Firstly, enjoying our own PSYCHOLOGICAL arousal by appreciating...

Women have to learn how to orgasm

In the film ‘Shirley Valentine’ (1989), Pauline Collins plays Shirley, a middle-aged housewife. Shirley comments: “I’m not particularly fond of it – sex. I think...

Women have to learn how their sexual arousal works

Some women appear to be so sheltered from the world of adult eroticism that one wonders if they have ever experienced sexual urges of...

Women’s sexual arousal and orgasm are not automatic

Almost complete mystery surrounds women’s sexual arousal. Women’s PHYSICAL arousal is rarely acknowledged and our understanding of women’s PSYCHOLOGICAL arousal is very vague. No...

Women’s sex drive to orgasm during sex

Becky explained via e-mail: “I had my first orgasm at 26 during masturbation - pretty late I know & since then no stopping me...

Female masturbation is relatively uncommon

Carolyn, a relationship counsellor in her fifties, told me she thought it unwise to positively encourage female masturbation. She did not give her reasons. “Many...

Sexual arousal

Sexual arousal is a mental state that arises when the mind responds to PSYCHOLOGICAL stimuli (of an erotic or sexual nature). Sexual arousal is...

Why sex is called ‘making love’

The heterosexual act of vaginal intercourse is designed foremost as an expression of love between a man and a woman. After all, if sex was...

Intercourse does not facilitate female orgasm

Men's sexual arousal is usually easy, which gives them a natural advantage. As a consequence, while men can usually hope for orgasm from their...

Women settle for emotional intimacy over sexual arousal

On relating our experience to others, we all tend to gloss over details or not own up to difficulties that were perhaps transient. I told...

How to get laid

Men should take comfort from the facts of female sexuality. Most women are unlikely to orgasm from intercourse alone (which provides insufficient clitoral stimulation...

Sheltering young women from eroticism

Reading the word ‘sexy’, a boy of nine screwed up his face in a gesture of disgust and said “Yuck!”. I asked him why...

Why do so many women dislike eroticism?

Pornography is defined to be 'sexually explicit material (verbal or pictorial) that is primarily designed to produce sexual arousal'. Two women give their views on...

Why do women not always appreciate displays of male sexuality?

I have never seen any reason to be embarrassed about my body. I am pretty. I have sensual skin that browns easily and a...

A man’s sexual arousal can be very flattering

In the early days of a romance, a man feels loved and needed through sex. A man’s sexual admiration for a woman makes her...

Why sexual arousal is more elusive for women

Sexual desire is associated with ‘sex drive’. The male sex drive is a man’s biological drive to procreate by thrusting into a woman’s vagina...

Male nudity does not cause female sexual arousal

The naked male body can be a beautiful sight and yet our heterosexual society is dominated by images of women's bodies. The ancient Greeks...

Sexual arousal from romantic emotions

Many women talk about sexual arousal and orgasm in terms of their relationship. They describe their loving feelings for their partner and explain their...

Women often assume sexual arousal during sex

Unless they masturbate, most women are unaware that clitoral stimulation is needed for female orgasm. Equally, they are unaware that before genital stimulation can...

Some women never tune into eroticism

Angela, a woman in her early twenties, was having relationship problems with her boyfriend of six months. She was upset that he enjoyed looking...

Confusion over female orgasm

When they talk about their sexual relationships with men, women will often refer to love, trust and commitment. These factors are obviously important for the...

The mystery of female sexual arousal

In the film 'True Lies' (1994) Jamie Lee Curtis, as the dowdy housewife turned spy in the role of a prostitute, performs a sexy...

Emotional intimacy

Enjoying sex for life involves continuing to be thrilled by each other’s company in a broader sense than just sex. It involves demonstrating affection by...